We’ve all been there. You’ve been on a date with your lover or your latest datemate, and things have gotten steamy. You’ve gotten back to your place (or theirs), and it turns out that they’re what’s for dessert.
You’re doing your damndest to give them pleasure, and from all the sounds they’re making, it’s working….until your jaw gives out. Or your tongue cramps. What’s a considerate giver to do? Soldier on? Ask for a break in the action until things get loosened up again? To keep yourself from having to make the choice between your pain and your partner’s pleasure, try these exercises to get your jaw and tongue in top form.
Before you try any of these exercises, here are two pre-tips:
- Pay attention to your breathing as you do them. Being able to breathe comfortably while you’re giving oral sex will improve your endurance.
- Try not to touch your teeth with your tongue during these exercises. While teeth can be a hot addition to cunnilingus, you don’t want to be gnashing on your partner’s most delicate bits accidentally.
Let’s hit the gym…
- Flip it up. Try to touch your nose with the tip of your tongue. It’s OK if you can’t — the point of this exercise to see how tight your tongue’s frenulum is and get a sense of how much length you can get with your tongue. It’s also good practice if you’re planning on using your tongue inside your partner’s vagina.
- Flip it down. Now try to touch your chin with the tip of your tongue. Again, you might not be able to, and that’s OK. You’re experimenting with range of motion here. And the flip up/flip down exercise can also just serve to strengthen your tongue. It is a muscle, after all.
- From the roof to the floor. With your mouth open and your tongue behind your teeth, alternate between touching your tongue to the roof of your mouth and the floor of your mouth. Play around with the speed, the pressure, you name it. This is another strengthening exercise — think of it like pushups for your tongue — but it’s also a fun technique to use on your partner.
- The ol’ back and forth. This is another exercise that’s also a good practical technique. Open your mouth slightly and let your tongue peek out. Then move it slowly from one corner of your mouth to the other, without touching your teeth.
- Tongue in cheek. Literally. With your mouth closed, move your tongue into your cheek. Press your hand against your cheek to provide resistance, and press out with your tongue. Do this on alternate sides. This will help build stamina and also gives you a chance to play around with pressure.
- Get in shape. Stick your tongue out. Practice making is long and pointy.Then make it flat and wide. Alternate between these two, and do extra reps on the shapes that are harder for you. It can be helpful to look in a mirror while you do this.
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Finally, just moving your tongue and jaw more throughout the day. Pay attention to if you clench your jaw throughout the day or if you grind your teeth at night. (If you grind your teeth, talk to your doctor about a mouth guard — you don’t want to end up with long-term jaw pain or even a locked jaw joint.) Big yawns are a great way to get a good tongue and jaw stretch in. Don’t forget, there are also other ways to slow tongue ache such as by using fingers or introducing a sex toy to your play.
And, of course….you can always tell your partner that the best way for you to get even better at oral sex is to practice, practice, practice! Hell, that’s probably one of the reasons us lesbians are good at orgasms — our sex sessions include more cunnilingus than most! You’ll find lots more tips and exercises in The Cunnilinguist book!
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